Exactly one year ago, I was in a place of desolation. I posted this because I needed to remind myself that amid all the uncertainty, I could cling on to the certainty of my Heavenly Father’s grace.
Today, I rejoice. Because the Lord has taken me out of the miry pit and placed a new song in my mouth.
Would I have wanted to go through this change earlier? Not a chance. Because I know His timing is perfect.
I needed to be where I needed to be for all those years because it taught me to love, and to draw strength from Him. And now I am where I need to be because He is teaching me about His faithfulness.
I must admit though that the past six months has not been all rosy. Sure, I’m enjoying the change in pace, the job has been interesting and colleagues have been warm and supportive. Then there are days when I’m swamped by a bunch of doubts and I become unconvinced that I’m where I’m supposed to be. Yet as soon as that happens, I’m almost immediately reminded of His good and perfect will, of which I can place my complete trust in.
I never expected this to be an easy ride. But I’m happy to be where I am.
Oh wow, it’s been a long time, hasn’t it?
You’d think I’ve been dead busy at my new job.
I’ve actually just been lazy cos now I have time.
Does that make sense?
Previously, blogging was a channel for release. With all that pent-up emotion left over from work, blogging was cathartic. Now that I no longer experience that same level of stress, I somehow don’t feel a need to constantly want to express myself.
And consequentially, because I feel less burdened by teenage angst, I have less motivation to write, and less opportunities for reflection.
I know this isn’t a mistake. Because this was the job I’d prayed for. I’d wanted a job that would give me more work-life balance, more time to serve in church, and to connect with family and friends. Then when I see how everything has fallen into place, everything immediately gets put into perspective.
It’s not gonna be an easy journey. Change never is. And even though I miss teaching and my colleagues, I have no regrets leaving. I understand now that I’m in a different place, and I have different priorities. God is equipping me with a new set of skills in this new phase of my life.
And I’m all in.
This new job is truly a gift from God.
When I submitted this new phase of my life into God’s hands, I knew it was going to turn out well. But I also had my insecurities. What if I made a mistake? What if I was actually listening to the voices in my own head instead of God’s gentle whisper? Then on the first day of work, I walked into the office and was immediately filled with an overwhelming sense of peace and gratitude. The Lord has led me into this, and once again, He has shown me that His ways are perfect.
And as thought that wasn’t enough, yesterday, a last-minute decision to catch a different bus to church led me straight into the biggest and most gorgeous rainbow I have ever seen. This was not a thin, tiny one in the distance. This one was totally in my face, staring straight at me just so it was clear. And in that moment, I knew He did this for me. He wanted me to see His glory shining brighter that I’d ever seen. I beamed and said a prayer of thanks.
I am grateful.